A note from Steve:
Welcome to Q & A Thursday.
Here’s how this particular brainstorm got started:
One night we’re sitting around talking about how tickled we both are at all the visitors who keep showing up at Monkey House.
And I say, “I can’t believe we’re actually having conversations about control. I mean finally. I went through ten years — grad school plus training plus clinical practice — without getting to talk about it even once.”
“Yeah,” Bert says. “Isn’t it weird how everyone ignores it?”
“I know. And it’s everywhere. It’s the elephant in every living room.”
“A slippery elephant, though.”
“Yes. That’s a good word. In fact, whenever we talk about it I worry that we’re losing or confusing people. And it’s not like in therapy, where they can ask questions.”
“Well,” Bert says, “you could invite them to.”
Good old Bert.
I think for a moment.
“That’s an idea,” I say. “But I have a better one. They could ask you the questions instead.”
“Me? Why me?”
“You’re the addict, brother. You speak from firsthand experience.”
“Well, yeah. But I relapse like every ten minutes.”
“That’s my point. You know how hard it is to recover.”
“But you know that too.”
“It’s not the same thing. I know it professionally. You know it personally. And that could help them feel less embarrassed about being addicts themselves.”
“Oh,” he says. “Like in self-help meetings.”
“Exactly. And one more thing.”
“Of the two of us, you’re more adorable.”
Which is how I convinced him. Because like all codependents, Bert is a secret narcissist.
* * *
So the plan is to henceforth reserve each Thursday for Q & A with Bert.
You provide the Q. He (with assistance from less-adorable me) will pick those he thinks he can answer. Then he’ll record his answers for you to hear.
Guidelines for questions:
1. They should concern the idea of control and the role it plays in your life. This might include control’s relationship to feelings, relationships, communication, emotional problems, parenting, physical health, self-care, spirituality, creativity and happiness. What do you find yourself trying to control? What do you wish you could control better? Or control less? You get the idea. It’s a big elephant.
2. You can submit questions either publically or privately. Public questions can be left in the Comments section at the end of each Monkeytraps post. Private questions can be mailed to Steve directly at fritzfreud.com.
3. All questions are subject to editing for length, language and/or clarity.
* * *
Finally, Bert has something to say. A self-introduction of sorts.
Click here to hear it:
(This is an mp3 file. On my computer it plays automatically in Windows Media Player. Your default player may be different. Let me know if you have trouble playing it. I’m not too tecchy, but maybe together we can figure it out.)
I look forward to your questions.
Stage fright notwithstanding, I know Bert does too.
See you next Thursday.
* * *
A Bert Mugging, cont’d.
As mentioned last time, BertMugMania has forced us to start offering these little beauties for sale.
And being altruistic as well as codependent, we’d like to do it as inexpensively as possible.
We’re currently in negotiations with several major mug manufacturers to get you the best price we can.
And — since the more mugs we order, the cheaper they’ll be — we’re asking anyone who’s interested in buying a Bert Mug to send us an email saying, “I’m interested in buying a Bert Mug.”
We should have a price quote by next week. We’ll order at the end of the month.
* * *