I have secrets.
Okay.
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Awful secrets.
Okay.
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Stuff I could never tell anyone.
I understand.
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Are you going to make me talk about them?
No.
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Why not?
My job is to accept you as you are.
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It is?
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Yes.
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. . . . . . . .
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May I see your diploma?
* * * * * *
Want more?
“You eat and you enjoy mom’s cooking but that hidden wrapper, that burger you ate when no one was with you, that giant bag of chocolate covered almonds you have in your bedside table. Under the magazines and the books and the scarf…just to be safe. You cry together but they don’t hear you in the shower, your tears melting into the teaming water drowning out the heaves of sadness. Of loneliness. Because you are by yourself with all you are…or more precisely, who you perceive yourself to be. A loser. A weakling. A frickin confused freak.”
From “Your Lonely Addiction,” at Lora Rossi’s blog The Hugging Home. Everyday life, closely (and often sweetly) observed. Check it out.
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June 29th, 2011 at 8:29 am
YAY!!! Bert started therapy!!!
June 29th, 2011 at 8:47 am
Thanks, Rhonda. Bert appreciates your interest in his emotional health. 🙂
June 29th, 2011 at 10:15 am
Hey, Bert. Before your next session, please watch *The King’s Speech*. Like Bertie, in the movie, I expect you haven’t been cussing enough. I’ll let Steve take over from here re The Acceptance Stuff, etc.
June 29th, 2011 at 10:20 am
Au contraire, Geoff. I curse all the time. Unfortunately it’s usually myself I’m cursing….
Oh, well. At least I’m in therapy now. 🙂
June 29th, 2011 at 10:24 pm
Hey Burt how are you this week? Things are ok here I have a busy week being therapized, (thats a good thing) but you are talking about a word that when I here it I want to immediatley puke, My experience with secrets is like you said everyone has them and that is too bad!!!!! But I will leave you with this which Im sure you have heard smart little monkey that you are, But for anyone who hasn’t “Your as sick as your secrets, But as healthy as your honest” I really like the second half, I have had a couple of “minor” set backs but my plan B is all about honesty,,,,,,, talk to you next week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
June 30th, 2011 at 5:32 pm
I love Burt – that is so great. I agree, you are as sick as your secrets and when you have things you feel you need to hide, you feel shame. What I have recently realized is that shame is so much worse than guilt. Guilt – you feel bad about the incident. Shame – you feel you are a defective person. Sometimes we learn shame from childhood, which then leads to things like substance abuse to feel better. It’s wonderful to talk about these feelings and get it all out in the open. Thanks!
June 30th, 2011 at 11:27 pm
Thanks, Cathy. Yeah, shame is the one feeling that’s always puzzled me, mainly because I could never figure out what purpose it serves. I mean, guilt serves to reenforce my values. Fear warns me of danger. Anger mobilizes me in a conflict. Even sadness informs me when I’m experiencing loss. But shame just tells me I’m defective or inadequate as a person, and for the life of me I can’t see any benefit in that.
July 1st, 2011 at 11:25 am
WOW…..simple and very powerful
July 1st, 2011 at 11:27 am
Thanks, Debra. 🙂
July 5th, 2011 at 12:02 pm
Great. Love this blog. Lora here…visiting from The Hugging Home at http://www.thehugginghome.com. I think anyone would benefit by following both blogs. Great stuff!
July 5th, 2011 at 12:05 pm
Thanks, Lora. Right back atcha. 🙂